People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. People who live in Google Glass houses shouldn’t be managing their own finances.

To err is human. To urr is phonetic.

Never let adversity stop you. You can always lip-sync if you’re tone deaf, and you can always N-Sync if you’re Joey Fatone deaf.

A watched pot never boils. However, if you’re on pot, it might start watching you back.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, and a picture is worth a thousand words. So a picture of a bird in the hand is worth two thousand words about shrub fowl.

Even a broken clock is right two times a day. Unless it’s digital, then it’s just worthless. Like you.

A rolling stone gathers no moss. That is why Mick Jagger chooses not to shower regularly.

A penny saved is a penny earned. A arsonist hired by a breakfast restaurant chain is a Denny’s burned.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. Never invite horses to your beach parties, they never do shots with you.

An eye for an eye and the whole world goes blind. Unless the people in question already have both of their eyes. Then that’s only two eyes lost out of a total of four. That’s still half of the eyes. Math is important.

By Blake

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